What the Coronavirus lockdown has taught me

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Image by Matt Seymour

I would be lying if I said that when Boris announced the UK was going to lockdown, I was fine with that. In fact I was super scared. The Coronavirus has caused absolute chaos to our lives and grief to others I can’t even comprihend. Reflecting on my own personal experience, I wanted to share what the Coronavirus lockdown has taught me.

How to be at home

I have always been a working parent since I had my first child in 2011. Working was my own personal way of getting a little bit of sanity and in all honesty time away from being a Mum and wife. I enjoyed my job, but since I went back to work after having Arthur, it was becoming more and more difficult for me to enjoy leaving my children and paying for someone else to look after them.

At the end of February I was signed off work with my anxiety, it was the worst I have been in around 8 years and whilst off I just thought to myself “why am I doing this?” We crunched some numbers and decided that we could manage so when I went back to work I handed my notice in. Working my notice, I began to feel regret and guilt for taking my children away from a childcare setting they loved and I began to doubt that I had made the right decision.

Then the Coronavirus lockdown was announced and being unable to work from home, suddenly, that was it. I no longer had a job and I was a stay at home Mum. Being thrust into it meant that all my doubts about leaving work were diminished, I felt confident being at home and confident that I would smash it, I didn’t really have a choice.

How important my support system is

Obviously not being able to see our families has been hard for everyone, but I think it just put into perspective for me what life would be like without our family and friends, the truth is that would be pretty grim.

I will never take a brew with my mum or a quick catch up over a glass of wine with my mother in law for granted again!

Not being able to see her Grandparents has had a major effect on Maisie, we have always had our family as an extended pool and not just us 4 in our own little bubble, so we did have regular contact so that has been especially difficult for her. Maisie knows that eventually life will return to some normality.

I’ve missed my bestie having her first baby, I’ve missed one of my oldest friends 30th birthday celebrations and I am about to miss another. Life will return to normal soon and I am going to make sure that all those special to me know how special they are

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Image by Nicolas Weldingh

How to organise myself

Before the Coronavirus lockdown I was working, bringing up two kids and just a general tired and grumpy mess. Now I feel like it has given me so much more time to think about what I want and the future. James and I have decorated two rooms in the house which would never have gotten done if we were at work (James atill works 2 days a week for now as a Support Worker) I have devised a plan to keep the blog updated with content, as well as film a weekly YouTube video with Maisie.

James has taken up a new hobby and has already made a table for Arthur using his skills. I feel like we have made the best out of our time behind closed doors.

I feel like for the first time in a while, my life has some structure and organisation and I’m not just winging it!

How to spend quality time

Looking back on our time before  the coronavirus lockdown, I feel like we were all just ships in the night. James would have his stuff, I’d have mine. We would be home, bath the kids, tea and bed, then up to do it all again the next day.

Now, we actually spend quality time together. We play games and watch films. We talk about our day, Maisie and I have been doing lots of baking and art projects and just doing alot of the things I always promised but never had the time for. James and I stay up late watching comedies and drinking beer, just the two of us. I never want that to go away.

It has just proven we dont all need to constantly be on our devices when we have a spare minute and I love that.

Globally, this pandemic has been the absolute worst. I feel for everyone who has lost someone, I thank all the key workers keeping our NHS and other essential services going.  I have been following whats been happening as much or as little as I needed to and one things for sure the coronavirus lockdown has helped me and taught me a bit more than I ever imagined it would.

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